Monday, October 13, 2008


Over the recent months my body has been changing a lot. But I have an excuse, I am expecting a baby and as of my last doctor's appointment I was the heaviest I have ever been. Throughout my life I have battled weight thoughts and issues, mostly being underweight, accused of being anorexic, unexplained weight loss and struggles to get back to pre-weight loss levels. Even when pregnant with my son I lost weight and it took me almost two years to get UP to my pre-pregnancy weight. Everyone who has known me and my struggles is surprised and pleased with my weight this pregnancy.

But I am 30+ years old and finally as a grown woman comfortable with my body and the ups and downs it goes through. In today's day and age there is such a pressure to be a certain size, not gain too much weight and if you are not a certain size you are fat. Well, I was a size 10 before I got pregnant. Some of my clothes were 12 closely approaching that taboo size where some women fear to tread. And what disgusts me to no end is that regularly the press is calling out a woman for gaining weight and being fat. Gasp, Eva Longoria-Parker is no longer a 0 she is a 2! Oh the horrors!! Seriously people, get real. I so fear the world my daughter will be entering once she gets to a certain point in her life with the pressures to look like all the models and actresses on TV. Yes the pressure was there when I was a child to be thin but I do not remember the different actress a different month being called out as being fat or gaining weight. I look at these women who are being called out and all I can think is where is all this weight they were supposed to have put on and if I can see it, so what? They are human and do have the right to eat.

Hopefully as my yet to be born daughter grows up in this world, I can steer her to a better self-image than I had/have and get her to ignore all the B.S. about what a woman is supposed to weigh.